The Invisible Labor List

1. Family Logistics & Scheduling

Remembering every kid’s schedule, practice, lesson, rehearsal, game, appointment
Tracking who needs to be where, when, and with what equipment
Booking babysitters and remembering babysitter availability
Coordinating carpools
Monitoring weather to pack the “right” clothes, shoes, coats
Scheduling pediatrician, dentist, orthodontist, therapy, tutoring
Filling out camp forms, school forms, medical forms, emergency contacts, waivers
Remembering passport expirations
Knowing everyone’s social calendars (“introverted kid needs a quiet Saturday,” “extrovert needs a playdate”)
Managing family travel (flights, hotels, itineraries, packing lists, entertainment)
Tracking return windows for purchases
Staying aware of school closures, e-learning days, early releases, delays
Managing gift-giving calendars (birthdays, teacher gifts, family gifts, party gifts)

Knowing what’s running low (paper towels, Ziplocs, toothpaste, detergent)
Tracking household replacement cycles (filters, batteries, light bulbs, smoke detectors, HVAC checks)
Planning and executing home improvement projects
Managing repair people (HVAC, plumber, electrician, painter)
Keeping track of warranties and receipts
Monitoring cleanliness levels and deciding when things “need attention”
Decluttering and organizing spaces no one else notices
Meal planning (kids’ preferences, allergies, upcoming schedules, who will be home when)
Tracking pantry/fridge inventory
Grocery shopping—physically or digitally
Remembering recurring subscriptions or auto-shipments
Managing pet food, vet visits, flea meds, litter, grooming appointments
Keeping holiday décor updated, stored, swapped out

Remembering birthdays, anniversaries, meaningful dates for extended family
Checking in on relatives
Making sure kids maintain friendships
Acting as the social coordinator for the family
Mediating sibling conflicts
Regulating the emotional climate of the home
Managing everyone's moods (“he’s overtired,” “she’s anxious,” “they’re spiraling”)
Anticipating meltdown triggers
Helping kids navigate friend drama
Being the default call from school when someone is sick
Being the default call from spouse when they can’t find something (“Where’s my…?”)
Doing the heavy lift on holiday magic—Elf on the Shelf, Santa, Easter Bunny, tooth fairy
Creating family traditions and rituals

Reading, sorting, and interpreting school emails
Monitoring homework assignments, projects, deadlines
Communicating with teachers
Signing permission slips
Remembering spirit days, library days, wear-red-day, pajama day, 100th-day-of-school outfits
Supporting reading logs
Tracking and paying extracurricular fees
Packing snacks that meet allergy guidelines
Getting uniforms/gear cleaned and prepped
Volunteering for classroom parties or PTO things
Buying supplies for classroom parties
Managing kids’ technology: iPads charged, Chromebooks updated, logins remembered
Helping with school fundraisers
Tracking platform-specific nonsense: ClassDojo, Seesaw, ParentSquare, TeamSnap, Band, Remind

Managing household budget
Tracking bills, autopayments, renewals
Paying extracurriculars, school fees, field trips
Filing insurance claims
Planning for holidays or birthdays budget-wise
Remembering tax-related documents
Keeping track of kids’ 529 plans, savings accounts
Managing the family calendar subscription (lol, eventually… Juggle 🤝 moms)
Researching prices, deals, coupons, codes (this includes the mental load of deciding whether it’s worth $7 to save $5)

Buying, wrapping, hiding presents
Managing holiday cards: taking the photo, choosing the card, writing the message, collecting addresses
Planning holiday meals
Prepping guest rooms
Ordering holiday outfits
Remembering teacher appreciation week, nurse appreciation week, coach gifts
Managing Halloween costumes
Scheduling photos (Santa, Easter Bunny, family sessions, school picture day haircuts)
Managing extracurricular recitals, performances, tournaments

Being the one the kids instinctively call for help
Answering “what’s for dinner?” 1–9 times a day
Knowing everyone’s favorite cup/plate/brand of yogurt
Knowing which kid will only wear the blue socks today
Knowing where every single lost thing is (or being blamed for not knowing)
Being the one who remembers to start laundry before soccer
Knowing when the last time the towels were washed was
Keeping mental lists of coming storms, upcoming tests, potential illness outbreaks
Knowing which friend’s parents are safe to carpool with
Being the household tech support
Being the household emotional support
Being the household logistics manager (even when your spouse is technically “helping”)
Noticing things—crumbs, socks, backpacks, appointments—that no one else notices